SONGWRITING 000: Love Theme From Opening A Vein

Songwriting 000 collects some of my sporadic attempts to write pop song lyrics. This ain't an easy task when you have less musical acumen than, say, Spiro Agnew, but we do what we can. I figure I need to get good (or at least passable) at this someday, if only so I can use the name Carlgems Records as my publishing company. (Why Songwriting 000? Let's face it: These don't rise to the level of Songwriting 101....)

Apparently, the fact that I'm not a songwriter isn't stopping me from attempting to write song lyrics. 

IMPORTANT NOTE ABOUT THIS ONE: This is a creative work, not a confessional. We all have occasional skirmishes with our inner demons, but I've known too many people who chose to take the off ramp to exit life's highway, and that knowledge is a permanent GPS routing me away from ever traveling in that direction. My inner demons have learned to mind their Ps and Qs lest I bludgeon 'em into sniveling, bloody submission. Hey, demons! I have a big freakin' shillelagh, and I'm not afraid to use it on your Hellspawn craniums.

This would-be song began in August with the sudden random notion of its title, "Love Theme From Opening A Vein." The title seemed unique, its first two sections wrote themselves immediately, and I stashed them for later reference. I returned to the work on Thursday, and let my blithe 'n' merry muse finish the job. 

I hear this as a fast, hard-hitting rock 'n' roll number, armed with electric guitars and lotsa back-up harmonies. Most definitely not a ballad. I don't necessarily hear it as a Ramones song, but...maybe? Or maybe Cheap Trick, or even the Weeklings. I'm just the wordsmith, man. The musicians conjure the magic that makes it a song.

But here are the words, for what they're worth. My novel-in-progress Meet The Frantiks! will require me to write lyrics for several songs that do not exist. "Love Theme From Opening A Vein" doesn't strike me as the Frantiks' style, but one never know, do one? If nothing else, it's good practice in the craft of makin' stuff up.

LOVE THEME FROM OPENING A VEIN

Lyrics by Carl Cafarelli

I’m stuck here sitting all alone 
It’s no one’s fault, the blame is all I own
A harvest of the empty seeds I’ve sown 
Marvel at the bitter fruit I’ve grown 

I didn't want to achieve

I wore my heart on my sleeve

Then put on an overcoat so no one could see

What was I thinking?

What was I drinking?

We have met the enemy and he is me

But I'm not gonna try to end it all

I don't wanna cause pain

And no one would really gain

So I'll just let my emotion sprawl

Singing's the same

As opening a vein

In spite of all the weight I know

This vein refills

It sustains me still

Full speed ahead and look out below!

My life's not a hit

Still I ain't gonna quit

I've got damage to do and fools to prove wrong

I'll turn my soul up loud

I might even be proud

As I rise in defiance and sing my song

I'm not gonna try to end it all

I don't wanna cause pain

And no one would really gain

So I'll just let my emotion sprawl

Singing's the same

As opening a vein

Living is its own reward

No matter what I say

I'll keep the darkness at bay

And the light that I'm careening toward

Is all I ask for pay

And it's why I'm gonna stay

I'm not gonna try to end it all

What would I gain?

I don't wanna cause pain

So I'll just let my emotion sprawl

Singing's the same

As opening a vein

Stand back! We're open!

Get on the bus

In me I trust

Reflection ain't a crime

This bus is right on time

This vein refills

It sustains me still

This vein refills

It sustains me still

I'm not gonna try to end it all

What would I gain?

I don't wanna cause pain

So I'll just let my emotion sprawl

Singing's the same

As opening a vein

Singing's the same

As opening a vein

Singing's the same

As opening a vein

If you like what you see here on Boppin' (Like The Hip Folks Do), please consider a visit to CC's Tip Jar. You can also become a Boppin' booster on my Patreon page.

I compiled a various-artists tribute album called Make Something Happen! A Tribute To The Flashcubes, and it's pretty damned good; you can read about it here and order it here. My new book The Greatest Record Ever Made! (Volume 1) is now available, and you can order an autographed copy here. You can still get my previous book Gabba Gabba Hey! A Conversation With The Ramones from publisher Rare Bird Books, OR an autographed copy here. If you like the books, please consider leaving a rating and/or review at the usual online resources.

This Is Rock 'n' Roll Radio with Dana & Carl airs Sunday nights from 9 to Midnight Eastern, on the air in Syracuse at SPARK! WSPJ 103.3 and 93.7 FM, streaming at SPARK stream and on the Radio Garden app as WESTCOTT RADIO. You can read about our history here.

SONGWRITING 000: 22nd Century

Songwriting 000 collects some of my sporadic attempts to write pop song lyrics. This ain't an easy task when you have less musical acumen than, say, Spiro Agnew, but we do what we can. I figure I need to get good (or at least passable) at this someday, if only so I can use the name Carlgems Records as my publishing company. (Why Songwriting 000? Let's face it: These don't rise to the level of Songwriting 101....)

Yeah, this one requires no explanation.

22nd Century

Lyrics by Carl Cafarelli

I don’t want to get left behind 
If you think I’m crazy, well, I don’t mind 
As the world keeps turning 
But no one’s learning 
And our eye on the future keeps going blind

The modern world only makes us numb
Failure of vision, triumph of the dumb
This century’s accursed 
Screw the 21st!
I’ll meet you in the next millennium 

I don’t wanna be
In this century 
So I’m heading for the next one in line

I’m heading for the 22nd century 

Packing nothing else but my integrity

What went wrong?

I don't have a clue

This ain't a song

It's my toodle-oo!

All I can say is I can't stay
You can keep your stupid present day
It’s not for me
It's not for me

Indifference would be bliss

Some fools voted for this

We're in a country full of dopes

There's no cause for hope

Still I try to find the strength to resist

But meanwhile!

I don’t wanna be

In this century 

So I’m heading for the next one in line

I’m heading for the 22nd century 

Packing nothing else but my integrity

What went wrong?

I don't have a clue

This ain't a song

It's my toodle-oo!

All I can say is I can't stay

You can keep your stupid present day

It’s not for me

It's not for me

It feels like doom

There ain't no room

For anything except a deep, dark gloom

If we're gonna live

Then something's gotta give

I don't know how we even got this far

Forget the crusade, just show me to the bar

IT'S BUY ONE GET NONE!

Sometimes life's just like a movie

But why's it gotta be Idiocracy?

I don’t wanna be

In this century 

So I’m heading for the next one in line

I’m heading for the 22nd century 

Packing nothing else but my integrity

What went wrong?

I don't have a clue

This ain't a song

It's my toodle-oo!

All I can say is I can't stay

You can keep your stupid present day

It’s not for me

It's not for me

I’m heading for the 22nd century 

Packing nothing else but my integrity

What went wrong?

I don't have a clue

This ain't a song

It's my toodle-oo!

All I can say is I can't stay

You can keep your stupid present day

It’s not for me

It's not for me

It's not for me at all

If you like what you see here on Boppin' (Like The Hip Folks Do), please consider a visit to CC's Tip Jar. You can also become a Boppin' booster on my Patreon page.

My new book The Greatest Record Ever Made! (Volume 1) is now available, and you can order an autographed copy here. You can still get my previous book Gabba Gabba Hey! A Conversation With The Ramones from publisher Rare Bird Books, OR an autographed copy here. If you like the books, please consider leaving a rating and/or review at the usual online resources.

This Is Rock 'n' Roll Radio with Dana & Carl airs Sunday nights from 9 to Midnight Eastern, on the air in Syracuse at SPARK! WSPJ 103.3 and 93.7 FM, streaming at SPARK stream and on the Radio Garden app as WESTCOTT RADIO. You can read about our history here.

SONGWRITING 000: My Kneecap Loves Your Kneecap (I Sing The Body Eclectic)

Songwriting 000 collects some of my sporadic attempts to write pop song lyrics. This ain't an easy task when you have less musical acumen than, say, Spiro Agnew, but we do what we can. I figure I need to get good (or at least passable) at this someday, if only so I can use the name Carlgems Records as my publishing company. (Why Songwriting 000? Let's face it: these don't rise to the level of Songwriting 101....)



This silly song title popped into my head decades ago. I think it stemmed from my cousin Mark, who wanted to start a heavy rock band called Subterranean Thunder, and he thought of writing a song called "Electronically Embossed Flowerpaste." See, that's a great song title. This was the best I could come up with. The title (except for the new parenthetical addition) is from the 20th century, but the lyrics are recent. Not fresh, perhaps, but recent.

MY KNEECAP LOVES YOUR KNEECAP (I SING THE BODY ECLECTIC)
Lyrics by Carl Cafarelli

My kneecap loves your kneecap
It's crazy but it's true
And I've got a funny feeling
That your kneecap likes mine, too

The head gives direction
The feet seek affection
And desire meets somewhere in the middle
The eyes start blinking
The mouth starts drinking
And the heart's just a clueless little riddle

If our brains were in charge
We'd be living so large
And know when a path meets a dead end
But we never listen
Common sense goes missin'
We try to stay straight but head 'round the bend

My kneecap loves your kneecap
But what does it know?
If I listen to my kneecap
I'll love you from head to toe

I sing the body eclectic
It knows me better than I do
And now the feeling is electric
These parts of me lead directly to you

Now I'm just guessin'
We won't learn our lesson
If we don't open up to what we really need
A kneecap's not smart
But maybe it has a heart
And we should follow wherever a heart may lead

My kneecap loves your kneecap
I don't think I can explain
I hope the rest of us is willing
To declare we feel the same

My kneecap loves your kneecap
Your kneecap loves my kneecap
Heavens above!
Kneecaps in love!

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Past selections in Songwriting 000:

A love song, Easy To Say

A Ramones song, Rocket To Russia

Collect 'em all!

SONGWRITING 000: Easy To Say (I try to write a love song)

Songwriting 000 collects some of my sporadic attempts to write pop song lyrics. This ain't an easy task when you have less musical acumen than, say, Spiro Agnew, but we do what we can. I figure I need to get good (or at least passable) at this someday, if only so I can use the name Carlgems Records as my publishing company. (Why Songwriting 000? Let's face it: these don't rise to the level of Songwriting 101....)




This is a pop love song I started writing in college, and returned to finish recently. It's about a guy who meets a girl, and struggles with what to say to her without moving too fast: the words of a lover trying not to commit too much, trying to avoid misleading the girl, trying not to break her heart, because love is so easy to say.  And then he falls for her anyway, the big lug! Just needs a power pop melody, harmonies, and some Rickenbacker (and tambourines!) to complete it. Apply heart to sleeve...now!

EASY TO SAY
Lyrics by Carl Cafarelli

I remember the first time we kissed
A hint of a promise I couldn't resist
I never suspected how much I had missed
Our story begins with a kiss

Every film we see, every TV show
Every song that plays on the radio
Weaves a tapestry of pure fantasy
A fairy tale, as we ought to know

Maybe love can be real
But I'm not trying to steal
Any part of your heart
To play any tricks, or make a big deal

We can be much wiser
We don't have to surrender to each other's charms
Wouldn't it be nicer
To just see what will happen in each other's arms?

But then

Our eyes meet
Our lips repeat
The words of some song we heard long, long ago
Our hearts pray
Our minds can stay
Strong enough to save us from just letting go

'Cause it's so easy to say love will last forever
It's so easy to say all you need is love
But the feeling is right
And you're with me tonight
And love is so easy to say

I get this feeling that we should wait
Why rush when it's better to hesitate?
Let's skip the lies that "True Love" supplies
And investigate before we say that it's fate

But you look so pretty tonight
I have to wonder what's wrong with me
Maybe love songs have it right
You can't ever win unless you're willing to fight

It's so easy!

Is it a trick of the light
Or the heat of the night?
You've chased away all of my sorrow
And in the light of the day
I'll still want you to stay
Oh, will you still love me tomorrow?

And so

As lips meet
A kiss so sweet
Our minds recognize what hearts already know
Because as of today
It's so easy to say
All doubts melt away in a lover's glow

And it's so easy to say love will last forever
It's so easy to say all you need is love
This feeling is right
You're with me tonight
And love is so easy to say

Maybe love isn't easy
But loving you is easy
And it's easy to say you belong with me

I remember the first time we kissed
And the tenth time, and the hundredth, and each kiss on my list
Kiss me again, I could never resist
A story lives on with each kiss

It's so easy
It's so easy
It's so easy to say, my love

SONGWRITING 000: Rocket To Russia (a song I tried to write for The Ramones)

Songwriting 000 collects some of my sporadic attempts to write pop song lyrics. This ain't an easy task when you have less musical acumen than, say, Spiro Agnew, but we do what we can. I figure I need to get good (or at least passable) at this someday, if only so I can use the name Carlgems Records as my publishing company.

Started writing this in my head after my second Ramones concert (July 6th, 1979), but never wrote it down until now.

"This one's called 'Rocket To Russia.' Take it, Dee Dee!"

"1-2-3-4!"

ROCKET TO RUSSIA
lyrics by Carl Cafarelli

Workin' for the government
Decidin' how your money's spent
But the cold war's gettin' too hot

Moscow's got a bomb
And I can't be cool and calm
Soviets are takin' a shot

I spent all my money on a rocket to Russia
It crash-landed fast, and I wound up in Prussia
German girls can stalk
"Ve have vays to make you talk!"
I fell in love behind enemy lines

The President's mad
The Russkies have been had
The rocket blew up in their faces

And here in Germany
My frauleins and me
Are on the run from the Master Races

I spent all my money on a rocket to Russia
It crash-landed fast, and I wound up in Prussia
German girls can stalk
"Ve have vays to make you talk!"
I fell in love behind enemy lines

I'm a double agent, baby
You can't catch me
I'll blaze a trail past the Siegfreid Line
With my frauleins at my side
I won't ever need to hide
We'll hitch a V2 to Hollywood and Vine

HEY!

Back in the States
No one dictates
What my frauleins and I are gonna do

We keep our eyes on the skies
So there's no surprise
If Uncle Sam tries to take us out, too

I spent all my money on a rocket to Russia
It crash-landed fast, and I wound up in Prussia
German girls can stalk
"Ve have vays to make you talk!"
I fell in love behind enemy lines
I fell in love behind enemy lines
I fell in love behind enemy lines

It's great ta be back in Schenectady, and it's great to see you all here. Take it, Dee Dee!

1-2-3-4!