April Regrets

I posted this a year ago as part of a playlist commentary. Today, it stands on its own.

APRIL REGRETS

April gathers her belongings and looks around the room one last time. As she prepares to leave, she is tempted to flash a middle finger at the room. The urge passes. The regrets will pass. They'll linger for a little bit, sure. That's the nature of regret. But the regrets will pass when they're ready to pass.

April sighs. Before the regrets, there had been such promise. Dreams. Hope. The magic of love and art and music. And then...disappointments. Disagreements. Bad luck. Bad faith. Bad decisions. Moments of light compromised by unwelcome shade. Promise gave way to...you know.

April pauses. She glances outside her window. Rain. Of course. She has an umbrella, but...rain, damn it! She shivers. She turns out the light and moves toward the door.

April stops. And April muses. Showers bring flowers.

April wonders: Does the sun really shine someplace else? The sun eventually peeks through clouds, even here, in this home where goals fell short and regret won the day. 

For now.

April sets down her things. She switches the light back on. The glare is unforgiving at first. Her eyes adjust. Her will adjusts as well.

She will give it another month. April will become May, and then June if she is able. A rose by any name, what can bloom will bloom, what can shine will shine, for whatever time it has. She will seek that bloom, the warmth of that shine. With regret at her heels, April...May...will keep trying anyway.

And so will we.

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