It takes a certain level of self-confidence to create with the intent to share work publicly. Writers, artists, musicians, singers, actors, directors, dancers, poets, bloggers, street mimes, stand-up comics, flash-mob participants, DJs, and all other folks who take the time and effort to move something from inner monologue to open air--even those among us who could be described as introverts--possess at least enough faith in the work to allow it to be seen. Some share grudgingly, some share flamboyantly, and there's a big range of ticks in between.
But we share, because we want someone to see what we've done. Hey, look at me! We think we did something worthwhile...we think. Maybe? Confidence isn't guaranteed beyond that point. Some creators are satisfied that they have created. Some crave validation.
Count me among the latter. I believe in whatever the hell it is I'm doing when I'm doing it--the act of creation doesn't allow the luxury of self-doubt--but when it's done? Yeah, I like hearing that the work connected with an audience. I dig the ego-boost of strangers looking upon my work and offering some cool variation of a thumbs-up. You, they may say, don't suck!
My recently-published short story "Guitars Vs. Rayguns" just received that sort of reaction. Following the story's publication in the AHOY Comics title Billionaire Island # 5, AHOY reader Daniel McMasters wrote a letter of comment to the editors at AHOY. Daniel's letter included this paragraph:
...Finally, I have always enjoyed the prose pieces in every issue of your comics. But I want to take a few minutes to heap special praise on Carl Cafarelli's Guitars vs. Rayguns. The guy crammed so much humor into such a small amount of space, I find myself wishing he (or someone else) could flesh out the piece into a four issue mini series. Or maybe just a ten page short in an anthology some day. Every sentence was a piece of gold. My imagination was firing on all cylinders, filling in the empty space between words and sentences with pictures of my own. That is what is supposed to happen with a good piece of fiction, and I loved every minute of it. To see the band members having intimate moments with Bettie Page, Ursula Andress, and Cloris Leachman would be priceless. But I guess I already have, in my own mind. So G vs. R is already perfect....
Well...wow. I am humbled and preening at the same time.
It means nothing, but it means everything. I'm still a hobbyist writer, middle-aged, chronologically closer to sunset than I am to dawn (or to Dawn, who never writes and never calls. Damn that Tony Orlando. But I digress.). Nonetheless, hearing that this Mr. McMasters liked my work enough to comment on it makes my freakin' day. These little things mean more than I can say.
"Guitars Vs. Rayguns" was written as a one-off short story, and was never intended to be anything more. But Daniel's comments got me thinking. I've got some ideas, an imprecise foundation upon which I could build...something. Might be something great. Might be something pathetic. But if I build it, it'll be something that's mine. And I would let people see it, and pray they found it worthwhile. Validation. I got some similar validation for a few other things recently. Maybe I'm more adequate than I sometimes feel, in those lesser moments when my grandiose delusions aren't in charge of me. I'm working on my book. I'm working on blog pieces. I'm working on. Hey, Look at me! Look at me. Hey.
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| Art by Brian Butler |
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This Is Rock 'n' Roll Radio with Dana & Carl airs Sunday nights from 9 to Midnight Eastern, on the air in Syracuse at SPARK! WSPJ 103.3 and 93.7 FM, and on the web at http://sparksyracuse.org/ You can read about our history here.
The many fine This Is Rock 'n' Roll Radio compilation albums are still available, each full of that rockin' pop sound you crave. A portion of all sales benefit our perpetually cash-strapped community radio project:
Volume 1: download
Volume 2: CD or download
Volume 3: download
Volume 4: CD or download
Waterloo Sunset--Benefit For This Is Rock 'n' Roll Radio: CD or download
Carl's writin' a book! The Greatest Record Ever Made! (Volume 1)will contain 165 essays about 165 tracks, each one of 'em THE greatest record ever made. An infinite number of records can each be the greatest record ever made, as long as they take turns. Updated initial information can be seen here: THE GREATEST RECORD EVER MADE! (Volume 1).
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