THE GREATEST RECORD EVER MADE! The Ohms, "License To Kill"

Drawn from previous posts, this is not part of my book The Greatest Record Ever Made! (Volume 1).

An infinite number of tracks can each be THE greatest record ever made, as long as they take turns. Today, this is THE GREATEST RECORD EVER MADE!

THE OHMS: License To Kill

Written by Zenny Caucasian [Josh Jeffe]

Produced by Ducky Carlisle

Unreleased, recorded circa 1979-980

There are two separate caches of pop music circa late '70s and early '80s that top my list of lost classics of the era. One is the cavalcade of shoulda-been-hits by Fools Face, a Springfield, Missouri combo whose second album Tell America was one of my favorite LPs of the '80s, but whose fabulous treasure trove of ace material remains obscure and difficult to get; none of it has ever been reissued, and my copies of their second and third albums are the only copies I've ever even seen. It's a fabulous catalog worthy of wider acclaim, but few will ever have the opportunity to hear it.

The Ohms are perhaps even more obscure than Fools Face. The group played the same late '70s Syracuse club scene that produced my favorite power pop group the Flashcubes. Both the 'Cubes and the Ohms broke up well before receiving their proper due, leaving only a handful of singles behind (two Flashcubes 45s, and just one lone Ohms platter, "Chain Letter"/"Teenage Alcoholic"). But the Flashcubes' legacy lingered, their demos were eventually released, and they regrouped to record more stellar material. The Ohms were forgotten outside of the 315 area code.

They deserved better. A rockin' pop power trio--guitarist and singin' songwriter Zenny Caucasian, bassist Rick Suburban, and drummer Ducky Carlisle--I think the Ohms first split right around the time that "Chain Letter" was released in 1979. As the single drew positive notice in Trouser Press magazine, Zenny and Ducky re-Ohmed, with new bassist Keith Korvair. They cut some terrific, terrific home recordings before powering down for good. None of these has ever seen legitimate release. Lost classics, for sure.

The Ohms were a great, GREAT group. I curse the cruel timing that only allowed me to witness 'em in person once, during the brief 1979-80 period when they were also playing with singer Dian Zain and once and future Flashcubes guitarist Paul Armstrong as an interim lineup of Dian and Paul's group the Most; the Ohms opened the show, and then closed the show with Dian and PA as the Most. But I know that relatively few folks even had a chance to see them at all, nor even hear them at all. I wish we'd all seen the Ohms multiple times over a span of years, of decades...but that ain't what happened. Like Del Paxton told us: You can't keep a band together. The Ohms were no exception. 

That 1979 single "Teenage Alcoholic"/"Chain Letter" remains the only Ohms music to ever see release, and those two tracks have been out of print since the Carter Administration. They recorded more fantastic stuff--"Hollywood Baby," "Boppin' At The USO," "High-Top Sneakers," "You're So Surreal," and my favorite, "License To Kill"--but none of it has ever seen legit release. This looks like a job for Kool Kat Musik, Big Stir, Propeller, Futureman, Jem Records, Think Like A Key Music...somebody!

Don't know the Ohms? Suffice it to say that this trio was one of the best rock 'n' roll acts the talent-rich Central New York area ever produced, a group with terrific live energy--OHM is WHO spelled upside down, don'tcha know--and great original songs. As utterly fantastic as the two officially-released tracks are--and there's good reason why Trouser Press raved about "Teenage Alcoholic" and "Chain Letter"--my favorite will always be the unreleased classic "License To Kill." Or maybe "Boppin' At The USO." Or "You're So Surreal," or...you get the picture.

But no: "License To Kill." A version of James Bond that doesn't insist one must wear earmuffs to listen to the Beatles, a secret agent livin' and letting die in the nightclubs and dives where rock 'n' roll thrives, a 007 who steals a foreign car and turns the radio UP, so all in Her Majesty's service can hear it. Gotta keep movin', you can't sit still. License to kill? License to thrill. For your ears only. Care to dance, Miss Moneypenny? We have a license that says we can.

(Flashcubes bassist Gary Frenay reminds us that we can hear the song on YouTube: The Ohms, "License To Kill)

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I compiled a various-artists tribute album called Make Something Happen! A Tribute To The Flashcubes, and it's pretty damned good; you can read about it here and order it here. My new book The Greatest Record Ever Made! (Volume 1) is now available, and you can order an autographed copy here. You can still get my previous book Gabba Gabba Hey! A Conversation With The Ramones from publisher Rare Bird Books, OR an autographed copy here. If you like the books, please consider leaving a rating and/or review at the usual online resources.

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