THE GREATEST RECORD EVER MADE! Works In Progress

 

Although I've long since completed (and submitted) a draft of my proposed book The Greatest Record Ever Made! (Volume 1), the subject itself remains open for me. I continue to work on more GREM! entries, for use here on the blog and for potential engagement in an even-more-theoretical The Greatest Record Ever Made! (Volume 2). An infinite number of tracks can each be THE greatest record ever made as long as they take turns. Maybe I take the infinite part of the book's tagline too literally.

Nonetheless! Here's a look at bits of some of my many GREM! works in progress. 

THE PRETENDERS: Back On The Chain Gang

It was just like starting over.

The Pretenders emerged in England in 1978, led by Chrissie Hynde, an American playing guitar and singing lead. Hynde, guitarist James Honeywell-Scott, bassist Pete Farndon, and drummer Martin Chambers turned out to be great Pretenders, debuting on record with a 1979 single covering the Kinks' "Stop Your Sobbing." More records followed: singles, two albums (1980's Pretenders and 1981's Pretenders II), with the 1981 EP Extended Play in between albums. 

And then half the band died. 

WAR: Low Rider

Has anyone ever used the word "imperious" to describe the rhythm of War's 1975 hit "Low Rider?" I'd presume it hasn't been done, and it may be a stretch to use it now. But GodDAYum, that regal riddum rules by divine and absolute right. Imperious War!

When discussing the records that make us wanna dance, prance, and make romance, we often talk about the beat. But more than the beat, "Low Rider" has a visceral, almost physical rhythm that dictates a mandatory moving of your body. Typical of me being me, I didn't come to appreciate that rhythm until way, way after the fact.

BONEY M: My Friend Jack

My relationship with disco is complicated. I hated it during its heyday, but began to re-think my position as it became clear that some (not all) of the Disco Sucks movement was built upon a foundation of tacit racism and homophobia. I further realized that a lot of the disco LP-burnin' Fascists hated my preferred punk and power pop almost as much as they hated dat ole debbil disco, so...enemy of my enemy is my friend.

But never mind the shifting parameters of my mixed-signal interactions with disco. Eurodisco group Boney M was a breed apart anyway, willfully weird but extremely pop.

PEGGY LEE: Fever

There is cool, and then there is cool. Cool-as-a-fever cool. No other approximation of cool has ever been anywhere near the sizzling cool of Peggy Lee's 1958 absolute annexation of Little Willie John's R & B (and crossover pop) hit "Fever." 

THE MAYTALS: Pressure Drop

Listening to Johnny Nash didn't prepare me for this.

I first saw Toots and the Maytals name-checked in some magazine (either Rolling Stone or Playboy, possibly both) in the late '70s, though I wasn't conscious of the music until many years thereafter. I recall that Linda Ronstadt was among those praising the essential nature of Maytals LPs Funky Kingston and Reggae Got Soul, and if I couldn't quite fit reggae into my new wave rock 'n' roll world view at the time (the Clash notwithstanding), I did get there eventually. 

THE POLICE: Roxanne

When I worked at a record store in the '80s, one of my co-workers was horrified when I mentioned that I didn't really care about the music of the Police. "Horrified" may not be much of an exaggeration; he gasped, put his hands to the sides of his face in a manner that would have made Macaulay Culkin proud, and backed away from me slowly. I think I saw him mouth the world Unclean! 

I had liked the band initially, around the time of their first two albums in the late '70s, but found myself losing interest in them as they became (to my taste) increasingly...mainstream? I guess. I wasn't trying to be hipper than the crowd, honest; it was just that I preferred their earlier records. I appreciate some of their bigger hits a bit more now than I did then, though I'm pretty sure I'll always detest that damned stalker song, "Every Breath You Take."

And "Roxanne?" My God, "Roxanne" was far and away the best thing on AM Top 40 in 1979. Nothing else even came close to it. 

ABBA: Dancing Queen

There is a false conviction among some rock 'n' roll fans that ABBA's music is inherently schlocky. This conviction is a big ol' pile of piggy poop.

AM radio surrendered to ABBA's "Waterloo" in 1973. I may have struggled with some indecision over whether or not I liked the song at the time, and I can't explain why. It was a pop song. I like pop songs. And I sorta liked ABBA. Ultimately, I decided that I liked "Waterloo," too. 

"SOS" was my favorite among ABBA's initial run of hits, though the only ABBA singles I bought were "Knowing Me, Knowing You" and "Take A Chance On Me." I also loved "Dancing Queen." I had no use for "Fernando." I was indifferent to "Mamma Mia" and "I Do, I Do, I Do, I Do, I Do." Reading in Bomp! magazine's 1978 power pop issue about "So Long," a purportedly great ABBA power pop song I'd not yet heard, was reason enough for me to buy my friend Jay's copy of ABBA's Greatest Hits. I was perfectly okay with ABBA's induction into the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame. Hell, a lot of ABBA's hits are closer to original-formula '50s/early '60s rockin' pop than anything that a band like, say, Genesis ever did.

"Dancing Queen" is ABBA's signature tune. It's often lumped in with disco, but its gloss is more girl-group than Studio 54. It shimmers in its own deliciously pure pop way, not beholden to trends, timeless yet still so '70s it could have been sporting a WIN button.

THE AVENGERS: We Are The One

The Clash sang that anger could be power. Even before that line appeared in The Clash's London Calling album track "Clampdown" in 1979, a San Francisco group called the Avengers was on stage at Winterland, opening for the Sex Pistols in that group's final appearance meltdown, and embodying the concept of cathartic fury. Anger. Power. Rock 'n' roll.

BLONDIE: (I'm Always Touched By Your) Presence, Dear

A love letter from Lois Lane, sung by Marilyn Monroe, backed by the Dave Clark Five.

Blondie's lead singer Debbie Harry was sexy without any appearance of trying to be sexy. She didn't even seem to be conscious of her everyday allure, her natural beauty and glamour, her God-given possession of It. She just was. 

My first awareness of Blondie came via Phonograph Record Magazine in 1977. I've never forgotten writer Mark Shipper's description of the band's look as "like Marilyn Monroe backed by the Dave Clark Five," a blurb which (even more than Debbie Harry's attractive image) sold me on Blondie well before I ever heard a note of their music. When I got to college that fall, I immediately started carpet-bombing the school radio station with requests for all of the acts I'd read about in PRM, from Television to the Dictators, and certainly including constant (and urgent) petitions to hear Blondie's "X Offender." I loved the track on first spin, and I have never stopped loving it since. And they called it puppy love!

THE JAM: In The City

Punk could be pop. In America, the Ramones already knew that, even if the charts didn't reflect the verity of that aesthetic.

THE YOUNG RASCALS: Good Lovin'

Little Steven says garage rock is "white kids trying to play black rhythm and blues and failing--gloriously." Fair enough. So what do we call it when a white group tries to play soul music, and succeeds? We could call that the Young Rascals.

THE RECORDS: Starry Eyes

Dreams of fame and fortune are not held solely by the performers.

THE VOGUES: Five O'Clock World

It should only be a footnote in the story of "Five O'Clock World," but the result is so engaging, so perfect, that I can't help elevating it to a prime moment in the history of rockin' pop on TV. 

THE DICKIES: Banana Splits

TRA-LA-LAAAA! TRA-LA-LA-LAAAAAA! TRA-LA-LAAAA! TRA-LA-LA-LAAAAAAAAAA!

No. You get a hold of yourself. Don't be messin' with the manifest majesty of the Banana Splits.

And don't be messin' with the manifest DESTINY of The Greatest Record Ever Made!, whether it's Volume 1, Volume 2, or an undrafted free agent. The infinite does what the infinite does.

If you like what you see here on Boppin' (Like The Hip Folks Do), please consider a visit to CC's Tip Jar. 

Carl's new book Gabba Gabba Hey! A Conversation With The Ramones is now available, courtesy of the good folks at Rare Bird Books. Gabba Gabba YAY!! https://rarebirdlit.com/gabba-gabba-hey-a-conversation-with-the-ramones-by-carl-cafarelli/

If it's true that one book leads to another, my next book will be The Greatest Record Ever Made! (Volume 1). Stay tuned. Your turn is coming.

This Is Rock 'n' Roll Radio with Dana & Carl airs Sunday nights from 9 to Midnight Eastern, on the air in Syracuse at SPARK! WSPJ 103.3 and 93.7 FM, streaming at SPARK stream and on the Radio Garden app as WESTCOTT RADIO. Recent shows are archived at Westcott Radio. You can read about our history here.

I'm on Twitter @CafarelliCarl

10 SONGS: 1/20/2023

10 Songs is a weekly list of ten songs that happen to be on my mind at the moment. The lists are usually dominated by songs played on the previous Sunday night's edition of This Is Rock 'n' Roll Radio with Dana & Carl. The idea was inspired by Don Valentine of the essential blog I Don't Hear A Single.

This week's edition of 10 Songs draws exclusively from the playlist for This Is Rock 'n' Roll Radio # 1164. This show is available as a podcast.

THE SMITHEREENS: House We Used To Live In

This week marked my 63rd birthday. The start of my 64th solar revolution coincides with the ritual emptying of my late mom's house, as my family prepares for the transition of our childhood home into the hands of its new owners. It is time, and it's okay. But in that context, there was only one song that could possibly open this week's show. Sing, you Smithereens. 

MIKE BROWNING: Blood Of Oblivion

"Blood Of Oblivion" is the latest single from Mike Browning, an able 'n' engaging cover of a 1967 track by an obscure Denver, Colorado group called the Rainy Daze. I was not at all familiar with the original, so Mike's version prompted me to bop over to YouTube and check that one out, too. And it's pretty good--if it's possible for something to be both psychedelic and sunshine pop at the same time, that description would apply to the Rainy Daze's "Blood Of Oblivion"--and I can dig why Mike Browning was drawn to it in the first place. Hell, I wish I'd heard it a bit earlier in my own timeline.

That said, I do prefer Mike's version. The Rainy Daze bring a period-appropriate...I dunno, preciousness to their recording; it's cool, and very much of its time. Mike approaches the song in a more straightforward fashion, creating a track that's radio-ready in the here and now. Radio-ready? Hey, WE have a radio show! And we're ready to play this again next week.

THE RAMONES: Go Mental

If I seem melancholy about my age or about letting go of the house I used to live in, let me assure you I'm not. I embrace birthdays; every year you can add to your c.v. is another celebratory two-word kiss-off to all of your accumulated naysayers. You even get to choose your own two words, though the second word does tend to be ...YOU! 

I'm not suggesting "Go Mental!" as an appropriate choice either. But the music of the Ramones has been a huge part of my life for 45 years, and I hope it's going to be an even larger part of my life in 2023. Any excuse to play the Ramones is fine by me. And, oddly enough, we'd never gotten around to playing this track from the group's 1978 Road To Ruin album until now. Go mental? Okeydokey. We've never had all that far to go. The road goes on.

PEGGY LEE: Fever

There is cool, and then there is cool. Cool-as-a-fever cool. No other approximation of cool has ever been anywhere near the sizzling cool of Peggy Lee's 1958 absolute annexation of Little Willie John's "Fever." What a lovely way to burn.

THE TRAMMPS: Disco Inferno

The Trammps were a soul group from Philadelphia. They're recalled as a one-hit wonder for "Disco Inferno," though the group did break into the lower region of the Top 40 with previous singles "Hold Back The Night" (# 35 pop, # 11 R & B, and later covered ably by Graham Parker and the Rumour) and "That's Where The Happy People Go" (# 35 pop/# 10 R & B). "Disco Inferno" was their only big hit, and it wasn't really a pop hit at all upon its initial release in 1976, its flame extinguished at a peak of # 53 (though it did manage # 9 on the R & B chart). This particular inferno did not seem likely to provide an eternal flame.

But then: 1977. Saturday Night Fever. And everything changed.

I have never seen this movie. I say this not as some point of smug, misplaced pride in my place outside the mainstream; even as my taste has expanded sufficiently to embrace some of the disco music I once claimed to hate, my disinterest in discos and the disco scene remains stubborn and resolute. Maybe I'd like Saturday Night Fever if I gave it a chance. I have no immediate inclination to give it that chance. And the passage of time has not mellowed my disdain for the Bee Gees' "Stayin' Alive" and "Night Fever."

"Disco Inferno" rises above all of that. Jesus, what an expertly crafted, perfectly produced record. The bass, the beat, the brass, the vocals, the pure soul. I heard somebody say. It transcends disco itself, just as the best power pop tracks transcend genre to be fully and simply what they are: great records. Burn baby burn. The dancefloor's getting hot. The DJ has just the right song for that situation.

THE DIXIE CUPS: Iko Iko

The Greatest Record Ever Made!

THE FLASHCUBES FEATURING RANDY KLAWON: Get The Message

RANDY KLAWON & JIM BONFANTI: Marlo Maybe

Guitarist Randy Klawon established his bona fides in the Cleveland music scene during the '60s, playing with the Choir and Cyrus Erie. He entered the TIRnRRverse last year, when Syracuse's own power pop powerhouse the Flashcubes recruited Klawon to work with the 'Cubes on their cover of Cyrus Erie's "Get The Message." Klawon also teamed with Flashcubes bassist Gary Frenay and drummer Tommy Allen to form the Halfcubes, whose ace cover of the Guess Who's "Hand Me Down World" makes us eager to hear more.

Now, Klawon has joined forces with former Raspberries drummer Jim Bonfanti for a new single, "Marlo Maybe." Commenting on the track's origin, Klawon says, "I wanted to write a song that I imagined could have been a single by the Hollies, tapping into their great harmonies and fingerprint guitar lines." Mission accomplished! Will next week's TIRnRR bring another spin of "Marlo Maybe?" Strike the "maybe." Marlo for sure, my friends. Marlo for damned sure. 

THE CYNZ: Tell That Girl To Shut Up

A Holly and the Italians cover? Yeah, we approve. I confess I didn't really get into Transvision Vamp's UK hit version at the time of its 1988 release (though I like it a lot more now than I did then), but the Cynz can nearly stand toe-to-toe with Holly and her paisans. Considering the fact that Holly and the Italians' 1981 album The Right To Be Italian remains among my favorites of the '80s, that ain't faint praise. Tell that girl to TESTIFY!

THE RAMONES: I Don't Want To Grow Up

As always: Don't wanna. Won't need to. Ain't gonna.

If you like what you see here on Boppin' (Like The Hip Folks Do), please consider supporting this blog by becoming a patron on Patreon, or by visiting CC's Tip Jar. Additional products and projects are listed here.

This Is Rock 'n' Roll Radio with Dana & Carl airs Sunday nights from 9 to Midnight Eastern, on the air in Syracuse at SPARK! WSPJ 103.3 and 93.7 FM, and on the web at http://sparksyracuse.org/ You can read about our history here.